两个人相处的最佳状态

不嫉妒,不迎合,有话聊,不尴尬。

人与人相处,需要一种关系定位。
只有定位好了,也说服了自己,方能轻松。

瑞卡斯说过:世间最好的默契,并非有人懂你的言外之意,而是有人懂你的欲言又止。

我不问 + 你不说 = 误会
我问了 + 你不说 = 隔阂
我问了 + 你说了 = 尊重
你想说 + 我想问 = 默契
我不问 + 你说了 = 信任

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互联网现状

网上所有的愤怒,基本都源于没钱;
网上所有的励志,基本目标都是挣钱;
网上所有晒的幸福,基本状态都是有钱。
正义的背后,是一群小人的狂欢。

Alan Watts

Faith is a state of openness or trust. To have faith is like when you trust yourself to the water. You don’t grab hold of the water when you swim, because if you do you will become stiff and tight in the water, and sink. You have to relax, and the attitude of faith is the very opposite of clinging, and holding on.


In other words, a person who is fanatic in matters of religion, and clings to certain ideas about the nature of God and the universe becomes a person who has no faith at all. Instead they are holding tight. But the attitude of faith is to let go, and become open to truth, whatever it might turn out to be.

Alan Watts

寒窑赋

北宋传奇状元宰相吕蒙正有一则流传了1000多年的《寒窑赋》。 如今读来,朗朗上口,其状物之精、明理之深,堪称一代奇文。

天有不测风云,人有旦夕祸福。蜈蚣百足,行不及蛇;雄鸡两翼,飞不过鸦。马有千里之程,无骑不能自往;人有冲天之志,非运不能自通。


盖闻:人生在世,富贵不能淫,贫贱不能移。文章盖世,孔子厄于陈邦;武略超群,太公钓于渭水。颜渊命短,殊非凶恶之徒;盗跖年长,岂是善良之辈。尧帝明圣,却生不肖之儿;瞽叟愚顽,反生大孝之子。张良原是布衣,萧何称谓县吏。晏子身无五尺,封作齐国宰相;孔明卧居草庐,能作蜀汉军师。楚霸虽雄,败于乌江自刎;汉王虽弱,竟有万里江山。李广有射虎之威,到老无封;冯唐有乘龙之才,一生不遇。韩信未遇之时,无一日三餐,及至遇行,腰悬三尺玉印,一旦时衰,死于阴人之手。


有先贫而后富,有老壮而少衰。满腹文章,白发竟然不中;才疏学浅,少年及第登科。深院宫娥,运退反为妓妾;风流妓女,时来配作夫人。


青春美女,却招愚蠢之夫;俊秀郎君,反配粗丑之妇。蛟龙未遇,潜水于鱼鳖之间;君子失时,拱手于小人之下。衣服虽破,常存仪礼之容;面带忧愁,每抱怀安之量。时遭不遇,只宜安贫守份;心若不欺,必然扬眉吐气。初贫君子,天然骨骼生成;乍富小人,不脱贫寒肌体。


天不得时,日月无光;地不得时,草木不生;水不得时,风浪不平;人不得时,利运不通。注福注禄,命里已安排定,富贵谁不欲?人若不依根基八字,岂能为卿为相?


吾昔寓居洛阳,朝求僧餐,暮宿破窖,思衣不可遮其体,思食不可济其饥,上人憎,下人厌,人道我贱,非我不弃也。今居朝堂,官至极品,位置三公,身虽鞠躬于一人之下,而列职于千万人之上,有挞百僚之杖,有斩鄙吝之剑,思衣而有罗锦千箱,思食而有珍馐百味,出则壮士执鞭,入则佳人捧觞,上人宠,下人拥。人道我贵,非我之能也,此乃时也、运也、命也。


嗟呼!人生在世,富贵不可尽用,贫贱不可自欺,听由天地循环,周而复始焉。

Roger Ebert

I know it is coming, and I do not fear it, because I believe there is nothing on the other side of death to fear. I hope to be spared as much pain as possible on the approach path. I was perfectly content before I was born, and I think of death as the same state. What I am grateful for is the gift of intelligence, and for life, love, wonder, and laughter. You can’t say it wasn’t interesting. My lifetime’s memories are what I have brought home from the trip. I will require them for eternity no more than that little souvenir of the Eiffel Tower I brought home from Paris.

Roger Ebert

关于读书

有人会问,女孩子上那么久的学、读那么多的书,最终不还是要回一座平凡的城,打一份平凡的工,嫁作人妇,洗衣煮饭,相夫教子,何苦折腾?
 
我想,我们的坚持是为了,就算最终跌入繁琐,洗尽铅华,同样的工作,却有不一样的心境,同样的家庭,却有不一样的情调,同样的后代,却有不一样的素养。

杨澜

看穿一个人,只需要7句话

一代谋圣诸葛亮,在《知人》一文中讲了自己的观人识人诀窍:

一曰,问之以是非而观其志;二曰,穷之以辞辩而观其变;三曰,咨之以计谋而观其识;四曰,告之以难而观其勇;五曰,醉之以酒而观其性;六曰,临之以利而观其廉;七曰,期之以事而观其信。 

他从对方的“志、变、识、勇、性、廉、信”七大方面全面考察,寥寥数语,却句句紧抓识人之核心要义。

来源:京博国学(微信ID:jingboguoxue)